Barb, do what is fun man. Dont stress about anything else then having fun, or working towards little goals. That is how EQ hooks ya, why it is so damn addictive, little bitty rewards as well as long term goals to shoot for. Have fun with friends or make new friends, and the rest of the stuff will take care of itself.
If you want Exp, at 60 I would say PoV, PoS is your best bet for groups. Swarming I dont know, im sure someone has a list here somewhere.
If you want gear, then farm Velious. ToV, Kael Arena, or work on faction killing and/or quests. Or farm plat somewhere and buy some stuff in the bazaar.
But, and this is why I think LDoN is the best expansion ever, if you want a little of both, the LDoN is the way to go. You get exp, not the best, but certainly not bad exp. You get the chance for decent uppgrades with drops in the adventure, wether augs or actual gear. And you earn points towards better gear with every success.
Unless I am on an AA binge or helping a guildie out with something, I usually do LDoN. Primarily because it is fun, but I also have gotten some decent augs as well as call of the muse.
As for the lower DOT/DD songs, screw em, get enough EF points till you can buy muse. By that time, you will be 65 lol
And Sin, i do the same thing, I dont NEED dex, agi, cha or resists, but why the hell should it rot? hell yeah ill stick it on something till something better comes along. Solvents are cheap. And your resists are fine as long as you keep muse up. If you dont have it up, OUCH. I have over 120 in all resists, and I still take cheap shots from casters when pulling if I dont have PoV up. Dont sweat the petty things, or pet the sweaty things either.